Thursday, March 15, 2007

THREE

Can't believe its been three weeks since my last entry!

Been quite busy with work and stuff and hormonal ups and downs of life with IVF. Although there have been quite a few interesting moments, the last two days have FORCED me to fire up the Blogger machine as I HAVE to share them.

Yesterday was the first scan since i've been stimming. I was quietly hopeful. The hormones had clearly been doing their job this time. A definite suppression was evidenced by my teary outbursts and irrational behaviour. There was window of normality - of one evening - as the Menopur ironed out the Buserelin (down reg drug) and I behaved like a normal person. That closed as the Menopur took over and I returned to IVF woman. The tears returned the next day. I've also had a hugely upset tummy and the odd headache.

Anyway, back to the story. All drugged up, I was hopeful of a better score than last time (I think you know where i'm going with this by now) but hugely nervous as I made my way to the clinic. Trouble on the tube - and my leaving late, meant I arrived late, stressed and even more anxious than when I set out. Thee was a new scanning lady there - who kept pronouncing my name wrong and seemed to think i'd be happy dropping my knickers without a curtain between us to protect what's left of my modesty. She was nice enough, but not so nice that she couldn't magic up more than the three (THREE!!!) measly follicles my ovaries had managed to produce. What were they thinking of? Sitting there relaxing when they're meant to be on full steam ahead.

I was mortified. Back in the waiting room there were two ladies with small children. MESSAGE FOR THOSE ALREADY BLESSED - LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN AT HOME WHEN YOU GO FOR AN APPOINTMENT!!! it's just not fair. One of them - scanned after me - returned to announce 10 follicles. That's really not on. Why should she - with her small child - have so many more than me?!

We waited ages to see the nurse and when we did, I could no longer contain the (very hormonal) tears. The nurse we saw - i'd already rejected one nurse because I don't like her very much and couldn't face hearing my bad news confirmed by her - the nurse we saw, was so sweet. She said that i'd only had a poor response last time (great) but that my eggs and embryos had been v good quality. They found our specialist - who happened to be in the clniic - and he came to see me to say "dont' worry" as he expected this and all's ok. My darling husband tried to calm me down, was v sweet, but by now had to rush off to a business meeting. I'd calmed down a bit and insisted he go.

Anyway, after a day of tears - yesterday - i'm more positive today. I only need the one and that's what we'll be aiming for!

Second story involves today's outing. Possibly the weirdest and yet most comedy moment yet in our IVF journey. We went to see a hynotherapist. He is the weirdest looking man - nearly 70 (as he kept telling us) with a brown wig and dyed brown beard and dyed brown eye brows plus thick fake tan. The brownest man i've seen! Had to stare at him. He kept telling my husband that we should keep having "abundant s*x" (Not sure if I should write the "S" word in full or I might appear in places I don't want to. He advised that hubbie should delay his ejac****n and asked if he knew how. Hubbie said he knew, but the minute I went to the toilet, hypno man started giving an indepth description of how my boy should control himself. It took all our efforts not to giggle. We couldn't look at each other for a second. I don't think i've ever felt so uncomfortable in my life. At least it cheered us up and took my mind off yesterday's antics!

Fingers crossed for some more follies tomorrow x

2 comments:

andi said...

Hello there - crossing my fingers friday was better. What news?

Andi
xx

Baby Blues said...

New to your blog. Got here through Cyclesista. I'm cycling too, with IUI#3, and just thought you might want some company.

I hope your follies start getting their acts together. Hang in there.