Angry

I'm in a bad mood today.

My grumpiness is due in part to two things.

Firstly, to the ignorant and ill informed comments of a radio presenter on this morning. The background is that our government has been debating changes to a Bill to update the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Act. There are several changes including a move to allow scientists - for research purposes_ to created hybrid embryos - the shells of cow eggs housing human nucleii - as well as recognising same sex couples as legal parents of children created by fertility treatment using donated sperm or eggs. Much of the changes have been been highly controversial and has meant fertility has been in the news here far more than it might have been.

Additionally, a move to reduce the legal limit for abortion below 24 weeks was last night voted down by our Parliament. This has (not surprisingly) also been controversial. My views on this have become stronger. I am, essentially, pro choice, but feel that if a child could survive outside the womb then it should not be aborted. 24 weeks does seem quite late to abort and should perhaps only be allowed where the baby is severely ill or disabled. I think that the majority of (if not all) late abortions are for this reason.

Anyway - that's a digression as i'm not trying to create a heated debate. The reason I was angry was at a phone in on Fertility on Women's Hour on Radio 4 this morning. the presenter insisted on referring to IF as a 'lifestyle choice'. A LIFESTYLE CHOICE!!! She queried whether or not IVF should be available on the NHS for that reason. That somehow people had chosen to live their lives in a way that cause their IF! I was furious. If it hadn't ended then i'd have called in. Our IF was down to a medical issue and NOTHING to do with our lifestyle. I'll bet the presenter has a raft of her own offpsring. The fertile world wants to do its research if they are going to make broadbrush comments.

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My OTHER irritation is my clinic. I had my NK tests done 3 weeks ago. As usual, there were no results from them. I didn't chase, because they told me that they'd call if it was urgent. Yesterday i had my full blood count done. It was fine BUT i got a message at 6.30pm telling me i had to go back for another (£300+) set of NK bloods with a view to IVI.g early next week. I called today to establish what was going on. It transpired that my NK cells are right up and although the FBC was fine, they want to test again. If it's still high, they'll treat me next week.

We're off on our weekend away on Friday and not back until next Tuesday. I can't get anything done before then. I asked if I should be worried and my Dr said - you should be worried until you have your baby. Great. Why couldn't they have told me this two weeks ago? Now, my long awaited for weekend will have the shadow of this hanging over it. It's f'ing irritating.

I'm sorry if this offensive to you girls still waiting for your BFP's who probably think I should calm down and shut up complaining. I really don't mean to be. I just want to be able to stop worrying about all of this. I had a good antenatal appt yesterday morning and now my clinic are holding up the warning flags again.

Anyway, i'll get my bloods done in the morning and perhaps I won't even need it doing. The only plus in all of this is that if they feel the need to do this then I get to score an extra scan as they check TP's ok before they do the IVI.g. If (G-d forbid) anything was wrong, they wouldn't need to do it at all....
Essentially, i'm not convinced I should be worried, as who knows if the NK stuff is valid, but it's an unwanted fly in the ointment.