It all feels a bit samey really. Been here before and it hasn't ended v well either of those times.
There's a dialogue between my old friends (who you may have met in my 25 June entry) Hopeful Hattie and Pessimist Patsy that goes something like this:
PP: So, here we are again. 4 eggs/2 embryos is EXACTLY the same score as IVF2. Why should this time be any different to that one when we crashed and burned in flames.
HH: Well, things ARE a bit different actually. There was no down reg so we went into the stims feeling much more normal and healthy. There were only about 10 days of hormonal drug hell....AND the transfer went really smoothly
PP: But it's the same crappy old eggs that we're churning out and they were started growing 3 months ago when we were in the middle of our 'post-failure alcohol/caffeine/sugar fest'. Yeah - (with sarcastic tone) they'll be much better WON'T THEY?!!
HH: But, Miss Misery, why do fertile couples take months to conceive sometimes. What's different for them each month? Some months it's just the right egg and sperm that get together. This could be our month!
The two of them just keep on bickering back and forth and Pats is the stronger of the two, no matter how many times I try to push her out of my head.
I've generally felt a bit disconnected this time. A bit weird really - can't explain it better than that. I'm having massively stressy dreams though and waking up at 5ish (to Mr G's grunting snores - sorry darling I know I snore too) and lying there worrying about how tense I must be. Which embryo would want to move into this stressed out ut.erus?!!
Seems to be the longest 5 days of my life so far and there's 9 more to get through! Never mind, i've lots of work this coming week and that'll keep my mind occupied.
Watched an ok film last night to take our minds off things
Mr G liked it better than me. I was disappointed that the main couple were blessed with two gorgeous children. I'm pathetic for even being bothered. I get more bitter and twisted with each passing day! We joked we should have gone into the DVD store and asked for a film about happily child free infertiles!Oh, last bit of news before I get to work on this week's restaurant review. My bro has a store in Syd.ney. He was called at 6am by his alarm people reporting multiple intruders. He hotfooted it down there to find police and fire engines galore. The dishwasher had spontaneously burst into flames and the store was in flames!! He sent some pics of the fire trucks
Nightmare but thank goodness for the firemen! They wouldn't let him in at first in case he'd done it himself. Luckily there was CC.TV of the dishwasher exploding into fire! Just glad all are ok and that they have some insurance. They were due to go on hols this week, but have had to postphone. I called and spoke to them and my gorgeous neice and nephew both told me they loved me. I must be so Pro.gesteroned up it made me cry!Hope all you ladies in waiting are going well. Thinking of you xx
5 comments:
The waiting is just pure torture. I feel like my transfer was like a month ago by now. It is amazing how 2 weeks can crawl along! I hope you can keep your mind occupied enough to make it go by quicker. I go tomorrow - and now that its here...I'm a wreck!
:)
me too, me too although you are a couple of days ahead of me. this is snail week. I usually find the first week okay but the second week is the one that KILLS me. I try to plan things for the evenings of that week. What day is your beta?
I hope the next few days go quickly for you.
Wishing you speedily through - and without any more fires. Sheesh!
Bea
Fires are scary. Glad no one got hurt.
Waiting with you Portia. Hang in there. I get those annoying bickering in my head too. Just shush them and try to keep yourself busy.
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